Does Your Husband Take You For Granted? 27 Signs He Doesn’t Value You As He Should
It’s naturally distressing if you’re thinking to yourself, “I don’t feel important to my husband,” and there could be a number of reasons for this.
The most worrisome reason is when your spouse doesn’t think highly of you.
Your relationship, your future together, and your self-worth all suffer when he abuses you like this.
You don’t have to put up with your husband’s rude or disrespectful behaviour if you feel that he takes advantage of you.
Gaining a better understanding of this issue and the dynamics of your relationship will enable you to make the most informed decisions.
Why Is My Husband Undervaluing Me?
You’ve started to think, “My husband doesn’t think I’m important.” What’s going on, since it differs from the regular ups and downs of a relationship and isn’t just a phase?
You want to know why your husband doesn’t seem to think highly of you. Even though both spouses may have contributed to the problem, the following list will assist you in determining your potential role:
You give more than you receive: If you’re giving too much, you might not even be aware of it. You’ve been so accustomed to it that you fear that if you abruptly stop, your husband would think less of you.
You’ve never been able to defend yourself or face someone about a problem, therefore you’re terrified of confrontation. You’d prefer to just give in to their demands.
You haven’t taken the time to look closely at your behaviour, thus you’re not looking within.
Reevaluating your relationship and working on improving yourself can be accomplished by being honest with yourself.
You’ve fallen into a routine and are too predictable; your spouse can probably timing your every move to the minute. No matter how much it helps the two of you, you won’t change.
You don’t have high expectations: Perhaps you used to have greater standards or you’ve always been afraid to be too demanding. In either case, your spouse acts appropriately.
You try to please too many people. You find it hard to say no. Either he takes advantage of this, or he thinks you’re giving naturally and doesn’t mind.
You’re always looking to other people for approval because you can’t function without checking in. You desire your husband’s approval before taking any action or making any decisions.
27 Indices Your Spouse Isn’t Appreciating You
These behaviours can help you make sense of whether your husband is treating you terribly or honouring and respecting you the way he should.
He might not even be aware of his actions, particularly if you’ve been ignoring them for some time. Use these cues to start a sincere and affectionate dialogue with him.
1. You don’t get his attention.
He walks out of the room or stops you mid-sentence. You feel as though you don’t exist since he doesn’t pay attention to you, consider what you say, or react to your remarks.
He seems to be the only one speaking in this one-sided chat and brushes off anything you say.
2. He disregards your emotions.
He doesn’t show any emotion recognition when you’re feeling joyful, sad, angry, or simply upset. He doesn’t want to reply to them or show that your emotions are important. You may even think you’re being overly sensitive, emotional, or overreacting because you feel invalidated.
3. He surrenders himself.
He stops taking care of himself, grooms himself improperly, and no longer tries to dress nicely.
He doesn’t seem to be concerned with impressing you or what you think of him. He no longer has to worry about looking nice and presentable since he has you.
4. He asks for none of your counsel.
It’s common for your husband to ask for your counsel when he’s facing a difficult decision or simply wants your opinion on anything he plans to accomplish.
It’s a polite gesture. In this instance, he doesn’t value your counsel or believe you are wise.
5. He gets in touch with you just when he needs something.
When he needs something from you, he texts you, calls you, or comes to talk. It has to do with wanting to be with you or pursuing affection. You get the feeling that you are just there to serve him when he acts in this way.
6. He gives his task more dedication than you do.
Being busy at work becomes a regular excuse since your spouse has developed into a workaholic.
He won’t even take a vacation or come home early to spend time with you. He doesn’t prioritise you, whether you are struggling financially or not.
7. He makes fun of you.
When you speak, a husband who doesn’t value and respect you frequently minimises you. He is impolite and makes disparaging remarks, giving you the impression that you are unimportant.
You feel like you’re treading carefully and your self-esteem plummets.
8. He quits chit-chatting.
He treats you silently and with a cold shoulder. He obviously doesn’t want to talk to you—not even to say hey or inquire about how you’re doing.
He’s just not willing to put in the effort to make eye contact, which may leave you wondering if you’ve done something to annoy him. Since your partner is meant to be your best buddy, you wind up feeling alone.
9. He leaves discussions unfinished.
He prevents the regular conclusion of the conversation. He might cut you off, hang up the phone too soon, or abruptly conclude a conversation without providing an explanation.
To act in such a way is to belittle you and demonstrate his lack of regard for you.
10. He puts his buddies before you.
Although spending time with friends is important for everyone, your spouse goes out of his way to spend time with them. He even consistently chooses to be with them over you, demonstrating his value for them.
You make time for the two of you alone, but it appears like he thinks you work for him and that you have to fit in around his schedule.
11. He wants to be away from you.
He leaves your presence behind. Being busy is one thing, but consciously trying to avoid someone else is quite another. He doesn’t want to spend time with you or your family in close proximity.
This is not just someone who takes you for granted. It now falls into the area of emotional abuse, particularly if he doesn’t bother to make an effort to defend himself.
12. Your opinions are unimportant to him.
Your husband doesn’t ask for your opinion on anything, even though your opinions and judgement are just as important as his. His actions demonstrate that he doesn’t take what you say into account. Rather, he assumes responsibility for making choices that impact the partnership.
13. He does not count you among his relatives.
It’s possible that his family is dysfunctional or that they disapproved of his choice to wed you. His relatives might live far away.
In any case, your spouse attempts to prevent you from communicating with his native family. He is discreet about what is going on in their life and prioritises their needs and desires over yours.
14. He asks too much of your leisure time.
In a romantic relationship, each partner must commit a specific amount of their free time and energy to the other.
However, if your spouse becomes unduly reliant on you, he may even assign you chores and errands to run on your behalf. Because he wants to be in charge, there is no spontaneity.
15. He is not trustworthy.
When he promises he will be there, your husband can’t make it and arrives late. He consistently betrays your trust by breaking his word. He may not make unfulfilled promises, but you can’t count on him to be reliable enough to know when he will be home from work.
16. He is not giving as much as taking.
In a partnership, there should be equal parts giving and taking. Your spouse lets you provide without expecting much in return, if anything, when he takes advantage of you.
As you take on the majority of the care and he continues to be self-centered, the relationship becomes one-sided.
17. He is not grateful to you.
Saying “thank you” or making a statement about what you accomplished can be used to express gratitude. You might even offer to clean up after you cook or give him a kiss in return for anything you did for him as a gesture of appreciation.
However, a husband who belittles you doesn’t accomplish any of that, giving you the impression that he doesn’t respect you.
18. He is indifferent to your requirements.
He ought to know by now that you have particular demands. A husband who ignores your needs and only thinks about himself quits demonstrating his concern for you. Always putting himself first, he acts as though your sole purpose is to serve him.
19. He never tells you when he’s going to be late.
It’s polite to let you know when your spouse anticipates being late, whether it’s for business or something else entirely, so you can make appropriate plans. When you ask the husband who doesn’t value you about it, he won’t do it and will probably come up with a lot of different excuses.
20. He assigns you the majority of the duties.
A husband who doesn’t value you anticipates that you will carry the majority of the responsibilities. That can be anything, such as paying the bills, taking care of the house, or raising the kids.
His actions give you the impression that you are on your own and that he is only there to provide financial support.
21. He speaks poorly about you to others.
Your spouse doesn’t value you if he disparages you in public. He’s treating you with disdain. He wants everyone to know that you are not in his high estimation.
Whether you heard about it through rumours or personally witnessed him disparaging you to others, it is degrading and embarrassing in any case.
22. He disregards your limits.
He is aware of the personal boundaries you have established for behaviours you would not put up with in a partnership.
These limits are in place to protect your mental health and self-worth. He doesn’t seem to care and doesn’t think there will be any repercussions, so he disregards them carelessly.
23. He refuses to give in.
Both partners must be willing to compromise in a healthy partnership. However, when your spouse doesn’t feel the need to show you love, he won’t make the effort to adjust or find a contented middle ground. The only person making concessions for the marriage is you.
24. None of the plans are made by him.
He overlooks birthdays, holidays, and anniversaries. You are the one who organises all of the celebration arrangements and starts memorable days.
And when those days arrive, he doesn’t seem to be all that into them. You feel let down by him.
25. There’s arguments between you.
In a love relationship, arguments are unavoidable, but they should not be confused with yelling matches or physical altercations. You feel like you’ve failed him and the relationship because you can’t help him with his anger management and communication problems.
You feel tired and anxious because there’s an underlying rage that could explode at any time.
1. Keep in mind that he has no idea how to be a husband.
Some people have no idea how to be the best spouse imaginable, even when they desire to so much. Ultimately, your spouse is not a mind reader, and there isn’t a universal formula for achieving success.
It could be that he needs to reflect on the kind of spouse he wants to be for you. Additionally, you might need to talk to him more openly about what you expect from him.
2. Have a conversation with him.
It’s important that you let him know how you feel, how he’s been acting towards you, and how his actions are affecting your relationship.
Concluding Remarks
Finding out your hubby doesn’t think you’re great is a
tough realisation. However, you may improve the connection and encourage him to show you that you are important with some self-awareness, understanding, and marital work.
